The Jonas Brothers, Or How Do I Stop Hating Myself?

Pop music.

Most people will say that they don’t like pop music. But (believe it or not) since it is popular music, the majority of people must like it. The Jonas Brothers are manufactured from the Disney industrial military complex.

Hyperbole aside, these guys have earned Disney a lot of money (I have no source for this, so just play along). I have no idea how much but my thinking is that the Jonas Brothers are still around making music so they must be successful. According to their Wikipedia page they have been active since 2005. This is news to me as I only remember hearing about them in… 2007 maybe. So they must have been dormant for a few years waiting to be activated, just like Walt Disney is cryogenically frozen in Florida.

In the autumn and winter of 2008 I worked for a catering company as a waiter for a variety of events. I gave drinks to people (including various celebrities like Bill Nighy, but I’m not one to name drop) and food too. One event I worked at was a private concert for the clients of a private jet time share company. Guess who was performing at the concert?

It was tough to find a picture that wasn't hundreds of pixels wide.

Lucky me. I was being paid to nibble nice food behind a curtain and listen to the Jonas Brothers do their sound check. It is impossible for me to describe what the music was like as I can’t for the life of me remember any of it. Fortunately I must have blocked it out. I do remember walking around talking with the other waiters and we all grumbled about it. Secretly I thought it was quite cool because I can complain and bitch to my friends and anyone else who would listen what I had to go through. It was a way for me to show off.

When I turned up to the venue I had no idea what the job was. The company ran like an assassin agency. I was the Jason Bourne of the catering business. Upon entering the theatre I was given a pass which had the Jonas Brothers on it, at the time I thought it was a part of an ad for something later. Much later than that same afternoon.

After a while I find out what it is… we are waitering for a Jonas Brothers gig. I haven’t been to many gigs, in fact I will list the other ones I have been to: Smashing Pumpkins, and Reading Festival twice. That is quite¬†embarrassing if you only count each Reading Festival attendance once. If anyone asks me I will not say I attended the Jonas Brothers concert. I was given money to be at the same location. What’s even worse is that someone said I look like one of them. I don’t. Honestly.

Unfortunately I was watching a music quiz show the other day and they had a question about the Jonas Brothers with one of their songs. I quite liked the song and downloaded it on itunes and have enjoyed it. I didn’t even steal it.

How do I live with myself?


There is a circle of hell for people like me.

Some of my music on my ipod is strange. I have an eclectic taste in music and am not a man who is bound by mere genres and categories. Anyway surely everyone likes some pop music as a guilty pleasure at least right?


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